Better to anger than to hurt feelings

Even though I'm middle-aged (right?), I keep having new insights about humans and human interactions.  Here's one I figured out yesterday.


If you (accidentally!) insult someone, it's better that you make them angry, rather than hurt their feelings:  if they get angry, that means that they're throwing it back on you, and keeping the insult outside of their core self.

Whereas if their feelings are hurt, then they internalize the insult, and carry it with them.


I suppose an implication of this principle is that if someone insults you, it's healthier to get angry than to be hurt by it:  keep it outside of you.


--GG