Naming public buildings

When I win the lottery
gonna donate half my money to the city
So they have to name a street or a school or a park after me
(from the Camper Van Beethoven Song, "When I Win the Lottery")


At all the universities I've attended, buildings are named for famous -- often, dead -- people (mostly male?). Particularly as of late, the names don't reflect the person's worthiness or relevance to the university -- rather, they reflect large monetary donations from the person, and/or their family.

Since I noticed this pattern -- I think around 1990, but maybe 1996-ish -- I've decided that if I ever came into an obnoxiously large sum of money, I'd donate it to a university -- for "name changin' reasons." Or -- more realistically -- when I become comfortably middle-class and am able to afford funding some sort of small scholarship, I'd donate the money to a university or a university department, or a high school.

BUT -- not to name it after me. No, no -- there's no fun in THAT...

No, I'd require that the building be named "The Flaming Squirrel" building -- and that a mural depicting a proudly burning squirrel be clearly displayed somewhere within the entryway. Or that the scholarship be called "The Unbearable Lightness of Beans" fellowship, and that part of the criteria would be that the recipient write a haiku about beans, to be presented at the awards ceremony. Something like that.

And, they they don't like them rules -- well, fine! They just don't get the money! ;)


There's a few buildings on campus here -- including the one I work in -- that are just called "Building #6." Hmm.... ;)


--GG