Testify!!! Can I get a witness??!!

Although I'm scheduled to work Tuesday thru Friday, I'm not going in to work today. (I'll make the time up Monday.) Instead, I get to go to the local courthouse to testify against one of the people that burglarized our house (and stole my twelve or so guitars -- of which I only got two back).

Mostly, it's just to attest that, yeah, the recovered property was mine.


I expect it'll go something like this:


Lawyer: And how do you know the recovered guitars were yours?

Me: Because I only buy unusual, non-standard guitars -- and then I often customize them. And that one, in particular -- notice how some sillyboy cut the sides off, moved the pickups around, poured molten lead into one corner, and painted the whole thing green? That was me.

Lawyer: And these recovered CDs -- how do you know those are yours?

Me: Well, most of them have my name written inside the jacket -- except for a few where they tried to scribble out the name, but you can still read it. And the rest -- where they tore off the inner page of the jacket, or just ditched the whole liner notes? They're of obscure Seattle-area bands. How else did a collection of those end up here in Brisbane, Australia, except through me?

Lawyer: Nothing further, Your Honor!


Something like that.


--GG